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The Argument for Letting your Soul be Single

Relationships!  This is a major theme for many of us in our life’s work.  We have set big intentions for ourselves to learn and grow through our relationships in our plans for this life.  I can’t tell you how many of my conversations with friends and clients have involved relationships just this past week!

I’ve been in quite a relationship clearing process for some time now.  I am setting more boundaries and raising my expectations.  It’s amazing how quickly this helps you to recognize who is the right fit for your life.  But it’s also amazing how many relationship related issues there are to left work through!  

Human beings are creatures of habit.  We have patterns and, if you aren’t mindful, we repeat them.  Hell, sometimes we are mindful and STILL repeat our patterns.  Take me for example…Part of my marital separation was related to a feeling of basically being unloved, unseen, and undervalued for a very long time.  This was a dynamic that I realized that I had allowed myself to experience and I decide to expect more for myself when things ended.

Yet, after that, I still found myself in an on-again, off-again, pseudo-relationship in which I again seemingly cared way more than the other person did.  Again, I cared so much for someone that I was willing to make excuses for why I wasn't getting what I needed.  It was a bitter pill for me to swallow when I finally gained clarity on the situation.  I had to get real with myself and recognize that the person I was feeling a deep soul connection with just simply wasn’t that into me.  

But this was the beginning of me diving in more deeply to understand my relationship with myself.  I read somewhere (I wish I could remember where so I could give adequate credit) this idea that we all have our own fire.  And that our job is to work on keeping that fire burning and glowing. When we enter relationships, we have to be mindful of our fire.  So often, when souls merge, one fire gets nearly extinguished while the other grows.  A healthy relationship allows for both fires to merge, balance, and burn bigger and brighter together.

I decided that in order to allow my fire to burn at its brightest and biggest, I would have to take some time for my soul to be single.  I would have to take a look at what I am allowing and what I want to change.  I would have to take some time to really get to know who I am and what I want in life.  I would need to learn to be whole without anyone else.  My soul knows that I am always loved and complete.  My human just forgets sometimes!  

So many people who I connect with in my work at Clarity are the helpers, healers, and empaths of the world.  Often they find themselves prioritizing the wants and needs of others over their own.  We make excuses for people not treating us well because we have the ability to deeply empathize and understand from the other person’s perspective.  But part of what we are meant to learn is how to make our wants and needs a priority as well.  You get to ask for what you need and have that be heard and valued. I am working on raising my standards and energetically calling in the kinds of relationships I really want.  I am inviting the relationships already in my life to either rise to meet them or be released.  

This year, I had only one of my daffodils sprout out of the ground.  It's been so symbolic for me! There it stands in perfect form, alone yet blossoming just the same! 

I hope this message is delivered to exactly the people who need it in this moment.  Please remember, you are loved! You are whole! You deserve to burn bright!  


Christy Forsyth, Co-Owner of Clarity

Spiritual Video Personality, Future Life